Sunday, December 31, 2006

New Year! New goals, plans, new me! Well, the old me with new energy and hopes. I might even find a few dreams along the way which I seem to have forgotten how to develop.

Some thoughts for today......

1 Nephi 18:1-3
"1. And it came to pass that they did worship the Lord, and did go forth with me; and we did work timbers of curious workmanship. And the Lord did show me from time to time after what manner I should work the timbers of the ship.
2. Now I, Nephi, did not work the timbers after the manner which was learned by men, neither did I build the ship after the manner of men; but I did build it after the manner which the Lord had shown unto me; wherefore, it was not after the manner of men.
3. And I, Nephi, did go into the mount oft, and I did pray oft unto the Lord; wherefore the Lord showed unto me great things."

If the Lord can show Nephi how to build a ship that was not what anyone else was doing ("neither did I build the shop after the manner of men") then if we petition to Lord ("I did go to the mount oft; and I did pray oft unto the Lord") won't the Lord answer us in the way that he answered Nephi? ("wherefore the Lord showed unto me great things.")
What is to stop the Lord from helping us do anything we need to do?

1. Not what we have seen before.
2. Not what others have tried before.
3. We don't petition OFTEN.

The only think that is stopping the Lord from helping us is.....US.

Can it actually be this simple? I think so.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Christmas Carols For All My Friends

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

3. Dementia --- I Think I'll be Home for Christmas

4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and.....

6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

8. Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

9. Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent night, Holy oooh look at the froggy - can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?

10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ....
"Thomas! Why do we have to go over this again and again? " Cynthia moaned as she flung herself down on the burgundy leather sofa. "I'm so tired of all this debate."
"Cynthia, I just have to find an answer," Thomas said soothingly. He sat down next to Cynthia and tried to take her hand.
"Don't touch me!" she cried out and at the same time she jumped up from the sofa and grabbed her pink cordoroy jacket off of the coffee table. "I'm leaving Thomas. Don't follow me. Don't try to find me." Cynthia turned and fixed Thomas with a blazing stare from her ice blue eyes. "IF I calm down and IF I decide that I can hassle this through ONE MORE TIME I'll let you know. Otherwise, you can just forget about me!"
Cynthia punctuated her last sentence by jabbing her finger into Thomas' chest with each word.
Taking a few steps backward with each jab, Thomas stumbled back onto the sofa. His eyes filled with tears which threatened to spill over and down his pale cheeks. Slowly his jaw dropped as Cynthia jerked about and grabbed the doorknob. The door flew open with such force that when it hit the wall a picture in a frame fell to the floor, cracking one corner of the glass.
Cynthia called "sorry!" over her shoulder as she ran from the room.......

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

It has been a while since I wrote here. Every day a reminder pops up on my screen to ask if I am going to blog. For a long time I have just dismissed it. Then yesterday we recieved an email from our son-in-law, Ryan about his blog. It is mainly about programs and work, etc. At least the part I saw. But it reminded me how much I really do have to say. I just don't say it.
Over the past few months we have been to Guatemala. We have brought our missionary home and helped him get started living in the U.S. again. We have had ALL of our children and grandchildren in our home for Thanksgiving. I have had miracles happen. It's all so amazing, busy, sad, and funny, thoughtful, and overwhelming.
I really must type it in here.
I think I will also put into the blog a couple of things I started writing a while ago. Hopefully I can figure out how to post them to the correct date?

Thought: The definition of insanity is doing the same things, the same way over and over and expecting something different to happen.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

In February I realized that staying in Harmon was killing me. I couldn’t eat. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Sleep was impossible. Each day my ability to concentrate was fading. Each way I turned was a constant reminder of the pain that refused to fade.
And I had to concentrate. I had to remember.
When I walked down the main street of town to my shop people stared and whispered. Even people I didn’t know began to watch me as they noticed the locals staring.
I could imagine the questions they were asking in their minds.
“Who is that woman?” “Why are people watching her so closely?” “What has she done?”
What had I done?
I fell in love. I moved back to my hometown with my new husband. I opened a book shop which had been a lifelong dream.
I killed my husband.
How could that be the truth? I loved Chase. I loved him still. But Chase was dead. Dead to the world, dead to me. Dead to the life we tried to build together.
This is a list of guidelines from Aram Mika. He was a man who worked for my company. He passed away a couple of years ago. Everyone liked him. He was only 50 something. I think he has some very good points.

11 Guidelines for Leadership

1. Practice a single standard of courtesy.
2. Focus on making your team, your people vibrantly successful.
3. Never attribute to malice that which may be explained by ignorance or happenstance.
4. You need not compromise civility to be effective.
5. Stay on the high road.
6. Treat every job as if you will be there for the rest of your life.
7. Embrace the requisites for senior leadership.
8. Shamelessly assimilate outstanding traits of others.
9. Think of your job in terms of three numbers:
a. Percentage of time ecstatic
b. Percentage of time satisfied
c. Percentage of time dissatisfied
10. Discard woulda, coulda, shoulda.
11. Enjoy humanity.

Probably these are 11 guidelines for Life itself.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

I began this thought in October 2006

Ethics Principles

To be truthful in all of our endeavors, and to be honest and forthright with one another and with our neighbors, friends, and Church members

To say what we mean, to deliver what we promise, and to stand for what is right.

To treat one another with dignity and fairness, and to appreciate our differences and our individual uniqueness

To build confidence through teamwork and open candid communication.

To take responsibility for our actions, and to speak up – without fear of retribution – and report concerns in the home, including violations of laws, regulations and family policies, and seek clarification and guidance whenever there is doubt

To obey all the laws of our Family, the Church, and the United States and other areas in which we participate and to do our part to make the communities in which we live and work better
This was written on October 3, 2006

BAILEY, CO - Agents with the Colorado Bureau of Investigation said the gunman who terrorized Platte Canyon High School last week was at the school the day before.......

KUSA - Although the Penn. Police Commissioner doubts there is any connection between the shootings at an Amish schoolhouse and Platte Canyon High School, many think it could be a copycat crime......

Nickel Pine, PA - 5 Girls Still Hospitalized; Gunman Said He Had 20-Year-Old Grudge, But Likely Not Against Amish....

FIRESTONE, Colo. A 5-year-old boy from Firestone is expected to make a full recovery after being shot in the leg.The boy's father Nolberto Ojeda, 29, was arrested Saturday night on suspicion of felony child abuse....

EVERETT, Wash. -- Authorities said a group of about 15 teenagers pulled a woman from her car and beat her Thursday afternoon near Mariner High School in Everett.EVERETT, Wash. -- Authorities said a group of about 15 teenagers pulled a woman from her car and beat her Thursday afternoon near Mariner High School in Everett....

ST. AUGUSTINE, Fla. -- Officials in St. Johns County said a man shot and killed after a high-speed chase may be the man wanted by the FBI in connection with a murder in Virginia and violent armed robberies in Florida, Georgia and South Carolina.,,,

HOUSTON -- A jury found a 12-year-old boy guilty Friday of killing his father, KPRC Local 2 reported.
The boy, who was not identified because of his age, was found to have committed an act of delinquent conduct, which is the juvenile court's version of a guilty verdict....

I have spent considerable time this week feeling sorrow for the parents of innocent children who have been murdered by crazy people. I want to do something about it. The only thing I can think of is to make my part of the world a better place by speaking up about morals and taking a stand against evil. I am very anxious to go on some missions. I think we can do some good in those areas. In fact, over the last few months I have been dissatisfied with what I am doing to make an impact on the world to make it a better place. I feel a need to reach out to others and help them.
There are alot of things I can do right now. I can walk for the Cure (breast cancer). I can donate to places who make Thanksgiving meals for the homeless. I can go to the Denver Shelter to help serve. I think I need something beyond teaching a lesson in RS once a month and going to the temple twice a month.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

On a day when I was pretty in tune I wrote down these goals for the year. I personally think they are pretty good goals. But I have not been "pretty good" at working on them. Today I will start again. In italics I have written where I stand with the goals, though.

Read Scriptures and other good books (I am not reading many novels now. Mainly non-fiction and church materials.)
Recognize what I learn from them (Write down?)
Apply what I learn in my life
Share what I learn with others
Let the Word of the Lord strengthen me, soften my heart, defeat my pride, renew my testimony
Pray with REAL intent (I have been more intent with my prayers.)
Remember what I pray about
Strive to understand the answers I receive
Respond to the answers to my prayers (Sometimes)

Exercise Daily
Strengthen my body so I can do good works (Curves on a fairly regular basis and I can feel the difference, even if I can't see it.)
Eat in moderation (Nope)

Think positive thoughts
Quit thinking so much about myself and my woes (Woes? We don't need no stinkin' woes!)
Think more on helping others

So overall, I think that as Ricky Ricardo (Do you realize that is Richard Richard?) would say, "Janice, you got alot of splaining to do!"
This is a very sad situation. Maybe I can do more in the last quarter of 2006 than I have done in the previous three quarters. Why waste such great goals?

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Cheshire Puss,' she began, rather timidly, as she did not at all know whether it would like the name: however, it only grinned a little wider.
`Come, it's pleased so far,' thought Alice, and she went on. `Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?'
`That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,' said the Cat.
`I don't much care where--' said Alice.
`Then it doesn't matter which way you go,' said the Cat.
`--so long as I get somewhere,' Alice added as an explanation.
`Oh, you're sure to do that,' said the Cat, `if you only walk long enough.'

I have always liked this quote. It says so much about life. And how am I doing? Hmmmm.....

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Last week I went to a memorial service for a young man. His family were very strong in their faithful testimony that this life is not all there is. They were strong. They were bonded together. As I sat in the congregation and listened to them speak about their son/brother I began to wonder what my family would say at my funeral.
I wondered where they would find the material to frame their words. Memories? My journal? Pictures? Then I began to think that maybe I should outline my funeral before hand. Not the actual words. Just a format.
Is this morbid?
A couple of years ago I had a dream that I died when I was 53 years old. That was it. Finito. (SP) If that would be the case then I have less than a year to make my plans. Hmmmm......

Thursday, July 06, 2006

I like to watch a certain TV Evangelist, Joyce Meyers. She tells it like it is. She’s humorous in the telling. She tells it from a human perspective. I don’t watch her very often anymore, but the other day I caught about 5 minutes at the end of her program. What she said really stuck with me and I have been thinking about it ever since. I am sure someone some where has said it before, but it must be what I need at this time. And I guess I should also add that I have forever been a believer in the motto of being where you are supposed to be, when you are supposed to be there.
This is what she said: (And I paraphrase)

“You must do the right thing at all times. If things are going badly for you, you must still do the right thing.”

Immediately I thought about my habit of heading for the sweets when I worry or get depressed. I don’t need the sweets. I shouldn’t be eating the sweets. The sweets are not good for me. But there I go anyway, eating sweets.
Then I thought about other aspects of life where we all might not be doing the right thing.
What kind of words might come out of someone’s mouth when they are angry or hurt?
Swearing? Name calling? Negative remarks?
What times do people lie? Do they lie to cover up a sin or to get out of doing something?
Do people rationalize to make themselves feel better, look better than others, or justify actions?

I wear a ring on my hand. It says CTR. Some people wear bracelets in different colors. They say CTR, Divine Nature, Individual Worth, Faith, etc., Return with Honor, WWJD (What Would Jesus Do). We have pictures of the Savior and temples in our homes. We have sayings cross-stitched on the walls such as, Love Is Spoken Here, Families Are Forever, Faith, Hope, & Charity. We listen to talks, often several times a week. We attend the temple. We teach lessons. We take all of them into our minds and hopefully our hearts.
But when we come down to that defining moment, when all the knowledge and faith we have is tested, what do we do?
When people are deliberately cruel, selfish, damaging…. What do we do when what they say is not true? What do we do when they don’t acknowledge the wrong or even understand that what happened was wrong?
The choices we make, whether consciously or unconsciously determine the direction our lives will take. I submit that we have to be conscious of what our choices are as often as possible so that when we are making an unconscious decision it will be the right one. Making the right decision will be a habit in our lives with no second guessing.
President Hinckley says: “It is not enough to be good…you must do the very best you can.”
Have you ever heard the poem called If Jesus Walked With Me Today?
Basically the poem says: If Jesus walked with me today would I….
Change the tone of my voice?
Change my clothes?
Put away the books I read?
Change the TV shows or movies I watch?
Change what I put into our body?

If Jesus walked with me today….
Would he gossip?
Would he ignore the lonely?
Would he shake your hands and make others welcome?
Would he deliberately deceive?
Would he deliberately hurt?

He would pay attention to the details and the choices to be made on a daily basis because they make a difference.

There is a story about an old man walking along the beach, picking up starfish which had washed up on the shore and throwing them back into the ocean. A young man came along and asked the old man if he thought he was making a difference. The old man bent down and picked up another starfish which he threw back into the sea. Then he said, “I made a difference to that one.”
The little things do count. Doing the right thing at all times, counts. Being in the right place at the right time, counts. Smiling, loving, reaching out to others, stepping outside of your comfort zone ALL COUNT.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

We call them dumb animals, and so they are, for they cannot tell us how they feel, but they do not suffer less because they have no words.
Anna Sewell (1820 - 1878), Black Beauty, 1877

I was thinking about Nikki, my Cairn Terrier. She started out as a dog for Leslie, daughter #4, when we moved to Denver. Leslie was lonely and wanted a friend. Nikki provided the friendship, but of course, Leslie graduated and went off to college. Then Leslie was married and moved to an apartment which did not allow pets. You will notice the first sentence the Nikki is "my Cairn Terrier." And she is. I had forgotten how much love and joy a pet can bring into our lives. Bob even likes Nikki! Every animal to him has to have a job. Nikki's job is to be our companion.
I wonder how Nikki spends her days.

Friday, June 09, 2006

Today I finally took the leap to start my blog. It is a leap for me because for one, I don't really know anything about computers. But I love the idea of trying to put down my thoughts in a more creative way. Plus, typing is faster and easier on my hands than writing.
In the past when I tried to create a blog site I was miserably unsuccessful. As blogs become more user friendly the possibility of someone like me being able to blog increases. That's a winning situation for myself.
So, hopefully I will be witty, fun and creative with a deeper side sometimes. Good luck to me.

I have been thinking that sometimes I will add a thought which I like. Maybe a comment or two!

"I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances. "
Martha Washington (1732 - 1802)

It has always worked for me! :)